25/7/06 Rainier Rogues Match report

Match Report.Only short one this week, can’t remember much about the game and Celebrity Love Island with Dennis Rodman – as seen in Double Team with Van Damme, the greatest Basketball crossover film since Shazaam with Shaquille O’Neil – is on. Although I would like to take this opportunity to urge everyone to go to Game on your lunch break and play this guitar game on the PS2 – it’s fantastic!

Intro…

After the heroics of last week, a feeling not felt since the feeling felt when I realised that He-man the cartoon was created in order to sell the toys was inevitable. There could only be the feeling of disappointment especially when Toxteth won their remaining games and were crowned champions without dropping a point. Our organisation was poor as was some of the finishing but, hey it’s only a game.

Game 1 vs Accountants.

The league’s whipping boys put up a good fight and lead for much of the game with a penalty. I don’t think I helped by telling James to dive the wrong way. Tim, 23, and 32 year old former male prostitute Paul Allen scored at some point, can’t remember which way round it was (but mine was probably the worst goal ever apart from Rupert’s lob a few weeks back) to beat the Accountants 2-1.

A hard fought victory with Owen and Stevie E playing particularly well. Also note, Paul Allen is the first person I have ever seen to be sin binned in five a side for kicking a player! Genius! Disgrace!

2-2 vs EMAP

Having lost to these guys a few weeks back we were ready for revenge. However, pink socked estate boy (who looked like he had fathered several kids to several different mothers) gave us a good scare with two awful goals. The first one James passed it into the net and the second, pink socks ran around our defence and hit it as hard and low as he could. 2-0. With the introduction of PALLEN and an all round more attacking game, new kid Owen Burgess (not his real name) repaid our faith in him after he continuously pretended that a) the indirect free kick rule does not count, and b) EMAP players did not exist during free kicks, with a spectacular goal from the edge of the D and a solid all round display, resulting in a performance worthy of ‘the best player in the second game’ title. After a few speculative (i.e. crap) long range shots from Tim, a saved one on one from Sam, PALLEN popped up with a pass to set up Walker who made the game 2-2. In the final seconds Tim failed to see a free Paul after taking it around a player, instead choosing to toe poke it over the goal – my conscience is now clear (at least for another week).

Man of the Week.

Rupert, Paul and Owen were all contenders for the *Sun Star* man of the week but this week the award goes to Stevie E for his all round play and consistent performances when he has bothered to show up. He and Sam were solid at the back despite the crap tactics employed by the young handsome Bradfordian, and he attacked well and was a bit dirty too. Also extra kudos for his brilliant acting when he denied being in the area for the first penalty – think of Ruud Van Nistelrooy’s reaction during the battle of old Trafford a few years back when Patrick Viera kicked him. Steve you have both lost and earned my respect. Presentation at Steve’s desk sometime today.

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